A. A gift from God.

To love and to make a positive difference.

A. Thank you for your question. I believe in today’s culture that your situation is not unusual.  It is an unfortunate statistic that children tend to follow their father’s faith path more than their mother’s.  However, there are many children who are inspired more so by a mother’s strong sense of God in their life and their commitment to following God.  How does a person develop a strong and vibrant faith?  Faith can be defined in a couple of ways.  One, complete trust or confidence in someone or something. Second, strong belief in God or in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather that proof.  To develop trust or a strong belief in anything or anyone it requires a relationship.  We have watched many people fall away from their church and literally run dormant in their faith in God because they have withdrawn or completely pulled away from learning more about God and investing in their relationship with God in every way.  No one can convert another person from their belief or unbelief except God.  It is only their choice and their decision to accept God’s invitation.  We can however be somewhat influential by the way we pray and live.  You may recall the story of St. Monica who fervently prayed for her fallen away son who himself eventually became a saint, St. Augustine.  The rest of the story is that she prayed for his conversion for 17 years but she was also very good at getting faith filled people around him.  You can well imagine that she invited him to prayer, to scripture study and to gather with other people as often as she could until one day he found God and developed an incredibly strong relationship with God.
Here are a couple of thoughts on how to help your husband and your children.
One, pray.  Call your family to pray together asking God to be merciful to those who have gone before us such as family members or friends.  You pick the intention but pray together for various intentions, particularly intentions close to home.  It could be your husband’s good health.  It could be for a growing love and loyalty within your family.  Be ready to discuss the importance of praying to God for those different intentions especially for the dead.
Two, read scripture together and be ready with some questions to inspire a discussion.  You may want to have your Catholic Catechism handy which also is a great tool for driving conversation.
Three, watch some videos together that bring to surface good values and faithful themes.  A good one to watch is The Chosen.  This series certainly is about the life of Christ but through the eyes of His followers.
Four, if you can’t get your husband to come to family gatherings then bring the family gatherings to him and again pray together.
I hope these ideas are helpful.  St. Monica is the patron saint of Patience.  Patience and love are two very important virtues needed when you walk the same path with those who see things different.  But above all, everything you do should be done and said with Love.  We pray for your husband’s conversion and that your children follow your faith-filled example.

A. Sarah, you have a very good question.  You have a good understanding of the priority for each of us on this earth.  Our number one focus should be God and doing His will, and in doing so joining with Him in heaven for eternity. Part of that calling particularly as a parent is in raising our children with the same understanding.  We want them to not only know who God is but also know God personally. In helping our children develop a relationship with God you help them develop a solid foundation for a fulfilled faith life.  It is normal for good parents to always be concerned about their children making good decisions and those children will make mistakes just like you and I have made mistakes.  Their relationship with God will be a differentiator.  We must trust God to be there always for them which He has committed to.  It will be up to them to continue to stay open to God’s calling and help.  With that understanding and direction the best you can then do is trust in God.  Help them develop a strong prayer life, study the scriptures and engage with other faith-filled people.  Here is a wonderful prayer to say every day and share with your children.
   Grant me, O Lord my God, a mind to know you, a heart to seek you, wisdom to find you, conduct pleasing to you, faithful perseverance in waiting for you, and a hope of finally embracing you.  Amen.
Don’t worry.  Be joyful.